Breaking news: Dawson broken his stupid server that isn't really a server!
Indiantown was shocked today when local systems administrator, Dawson McDesktopserver could not fix his server, according to parties close to Mr. McDesktopserver whose servers are currently working.
When reached for comment, Mr. McDesktopserver said, "Derp, I can't fix my server. It's in no way the right form factor and I literally have boxes of raspberry pis."